Our CEO/Executive Director Celebrates 20 Years at ICAN

“It’s all family - it always comes back to that.”

Our CEO/Executive Director Steven Bulger just hit his twenty year mark with the agency, a milestone in his long career in human services. His story is out there in many forms and the community is aware of his beginnings – starting as a care coordinator when we were Kids Oneida and rising through many positions along his way to CEO.

We sat with him to go deeper into his origin story, get a snapshot into his days at the helm of a rapidly growing agency, and uncover a few of his secrets on becoming one of the most consistent, mission-driven, “say it and live it” leaders in the area.

What kind of kid were you?

I was the kind of kid that got along with everybody. I loved school. I loved speech and debate. I did sports and was in the plays and musicals. At home, we were a close-knit family and we were always together. Overall, I feel I had a very well-rounded childhood growing up in Holland Patent.

My parents divorced when we were young and that presents its challenges for sure - split families raise you a bit differently and naturally conditions you to resolve things better and come up with solutions. Yes there were some tough times, but with the love and support of my family, I didn’t even realize that until later in life. My parents always were, and still are, my biggest cheerleaders in life and for ICAN.

What did you want to be when you got older?

At a young age, I knew I wanted to be a lawyer but remember distinctly not wanting to work in Family Court - the stress of having to make tough decisions for other families was too much for me. That sticks with me today. I do everything I can to help preserve families. Turns out, Family Court is an important partner in our work today and has always been, and that goal of becoming a lawyer took an interesting turn along the way!

That’s a great part of your story that you always share! Tell us more about those couple of pivotal experiences you had during college.

I had to work full time during college, as so many students do. Freshman year at Niagara University, I volunteered at the Boys and Girls Club. When I found out that my Walmart job wouldn’t hire me back because I was seasonal, I asked the Boys and Girls Club if they would bring me on. I was 18 years old, working 30 hours a week there while going to school. I introduced the kids to computers and keyboarding and they couldn’t go into the gym or hit the ping pong tables until they did their homework - I was the one in between them and fun! I was around youthful energy, awesome daily banter, and the most diversity in so many ways that I had experienced up to that point in my life. It was eye opening and life changing.

Tell us about your first job out of college.

I got my foot in the door at a Residential Treatment Facility (RFT) in Buffalo and my title was Mental Health Specialist. The cottage I was assigned to had young men just like the ones I had gotten to know so well at the Boys and Girls Club. These were “my guys” and I was excited to start. On my very FIRST day, an incident happened at the neighboring cottage that was absolutely pivotal for me. It was chaos. The kids were in flight or fight mode. The sixteen year old in the room we entered was petrified and ended up stabbing the guy I was with. He wasn’t hurt badly, but I will never forget the look in that young boy’s face and how the chaos of the place overtook him.

From there I knew two things. First, I did not want to work in that realm where it was “the end of the road” for kids who have been swallowed by a system they couldn’t navigate out of. And second, I would do anything I can to make sure that kids don’t end up in a situation like that where they’re away from their parents and scared for their life.

I transferred out and went into preventative work at the same place and THAT’S where it clicked. I loved introducing and implementing interventions early on, helping correct behaviors and providing connections and opportunities that led to MUCH more positive outcomes for kids and families. We would do anything and everything for the kids – we were their big brothers, father figures, teachers, disciplinarians and mentors.

Over 25 years later, when I need reminders of why I love this work, I have a few meaningful things in my desk drawer from the kids back at that job – a Scooby Doo keychain and a Dollar Store plaque that has a hunting dog on it. To get a gift from those young people at that time in their lives… just wow.

And you continued that work when you moved back to the area and found Kids Oneida!

You bet! The journey is always so great to look back on... if the Boys and Girls Club would have never happened, then I might not have leaned away from law and into human services. I wouldn’t have had that early experience in RTF that framed the exact type of work I wanted to do. I met my (now wife!) Laura, moved back to the area and called every CEO I could to eventually land at Kids Oneida in 2005 as a Service Coordinator. And here we are.

What was your early work like at Kids Oneida?

We put in the work for sure. My first promotion at KO was becoming a Residential Outreach Specialist for the Return Home Early Project. We were working to get kids who were in placement very far from their families throughout the state back home or transferred closer to Utica. Kids were stuck in that system and languishing in the “toughest of the tough” facilities, immersed in a pipeline to prison, sometimes for pretty minor infractions.

Every kid I saw and advocated for was a kid who reminded me of those I worked with at that first job. I was staying the course with the work and building on my experience. In the first two year we ran Return Home Early, we cut the number of kids in care in half and ensured those who needed to be in care were closer to home.

From there all the way up to CEO/Executive Director. What’s that like?

It’s awesome and it’s tough!

I love interacting with people and getting to know them. My favorite appointment is Coffee with the CEO where I get the chance to meet with our newest hires. I enjoy shouting people out when I can and knowing what milestones in their lives they’re hitting. Seeing growth in the agency and people is second to none for me.

There is another side of being a CEO that leaves you a bit “on an island”. You’re in a spot that has a great deal of stressors. Every decision, every email and sometimes every word can be under a microscope. One interaction or decision can literally be the one that shapes someone’s life.

I helped start the Mohawk Valley Non-Profit Executive Director Coalition and there are close to 50 area EDs who get together quarterly to offer peer support and perspective. A big piece of advice I have to everyone in their personal and professional lives - “find your people”. It can be your self care, a lifeline, it can spur growth and leaves you energized. And I love being “that person” for newer execs - I will always put myself out there for connection and guidance.

One thing people say about you often is that you’re consistent. What is your secret?

I have to think my upbringing and the things my family needed from me helped shape this for me. As for actual tactics I use, a lot of times I won’t have the radio on in the car. I’ll give the speech I need to do as I’m driving or play through difficult conversations in my head to work things through. Take the time! Prepare! Then you can deliver in an even-keeled, positive way.

Another piece of advice - you have to be true. You have to be the same person. You can’t fake it. People will know instantly if you’re not genuine and they will not follow you in that space. I like the phrase “the chair doesn’t define the person, the person defines the chair.”

You’ve had two kids in the twenty years you’ve been with us! Has your work at ICAN framed your own parenting?

No doubt! While nothing can 100% prepare you for being a parent, my work has helped to shape my kids in many ways. They are very conscious of the work we do. It has given them a perspective on life and experiences I didn’t have growing up. The training our team does and the things we’ve seen in our work particularly on social media use have worked into my parenting - living, knowing and hearing the impact it has on kids makes a difference.

I think anyone who works with me will tell you, I am family-first every step of the way. I’m rearranging my schedule so I can accomplish that. If my daughter has a sectional game at 3:30pm, I’m there. It’s important. And it’s important for me to model that to everyone at ICAN and beyond.

Did you ever think you’d be at one agency for 20 years?

Wow. It’s humbling. This is the way people USED to work! There is a certain comfort in having years of experiences with people, the company and the community. There is pride and loyalty in wearing the logo and being with something this long. (It’s a little like the pride you have for your high school or college!)

I have to say, we inherited the culture and we built it from there. The work-life balance and family-first approach was something the agency’s initial leadership instilled, we knew it was our responsibility to nurture it, and it will be the next leader’s responsibility to continue it.

Innovation is your driver and your challenge to everyone around you. How do you foster that?

I will always ask the questions. How far can you push the boundaries? What motivates you? What’s possible? What’s a passion project you have? How can you look differently at school-based programming, housing, homelessness? Come with the solution! Tell me what it looks like!

I love to hear the word "no" or that an idea is a little crazy. I’ll come back with “it’s crazy, but it’s possible!” I’m not a micromanager, I’m a maximizer. And you bet I will get in the trenches and roll my sleeves up with you for an innovative idea!

What does success look like in your role?

In my role, it will continue to be growth and touching as many lives as possible. We want to make anyone’s situation better than before they came to us. For staff, I want us to be the best employer they’ve had and they are a better employee as a result. Their family situation is better because they’re balanced at their job. And my personal success… being true to who I am and being the best dad. That trumps it all!

What excites you about the next 10 years?

The stuff that I don’t even know! If you asked me 10 years ago, I never would have said a children’s museum, or SNUG, or a sports complex. Technologies might not even exist yet to help make even more of a difference in the life of families. Growth in schools, housing and even other areas we haven’t thought of yet. THAT’S what excites me!